I'm really really deadly sorry that I haven't been active!  But, ah well.
I've gotten into a fancy-shmancey boarding art school which i'm too too exited for.
I've lost, ONLY A POUND since you've last read?
ONLY A POUND.
Working my ass off for a pound. Sooomebody help me.


I think I'm in love and i'd like to be married and move to a very nice quiet town where people ride bikes and burn calories doing everything everywhere. I wish no one was fat. Fat people make me sad. I make me sad, ah, the complications of life.

I'M FEELING GREAT! 

Really, very, extremely, fantastic. I know I've lost weight, even without a scale, I know it! It's extremely cold but ah well. I'm so very happy, haven't been eating very much, and I don't even mind! I can't wait to go back home having lost all this weight. I'm so in control right now, in the zone. 

Tonight dinner with the family, pleasekillmenow, but no! I think I'm pretty good at lying now, I'll be able to get past them. I will I will I will. I'll eat a chicken breast, no butter, no oil. maybe? Probably! And a pickle, well, I might just skip the pickle, which is great, great, great! 

I'm really really proud of myself, all this fat is just like melting off. Serves it right. 

I'll write about what I've had when I get back! 

Oh and there's a guy, I'll call him frenchie, alright? Well, he's french. (Um, hello miss obvious, pleased to meet you.) and he's really very hot, he's staying at my hotel and we're going bowling tomorrow. He's the one that helped me out when I half fainted at the gym, but he's a bit older than me, ah well.

 J'aime les gars chauds française. 

I'm feeling really strange lately

Everything hurts, always. It's hard to sit down, to lay down, even walking is a pain. My legs are always sore (from the constant exercise), and my bed is as hard and as uncomfortable as a brick.

Finished reading "The Best Little Girl In The World", oh why do they always recover? I'm a little jealous.


Anyway, other then that, not as tired anymore! Which is really really good. Very cold, though. Still no scale and I'm dying here. I want a scale so badly, to see those numbers. Obviously, they wont be "pleasant" but you know. They'll be better! My parents aren't letting me stick to the whole vegetarian things. They say, and I quote, "We invite you to go on holiday with, you eat like a human, not a goat" well, I don't think I'm eating cans so it's all good.

Meal plan for today goes something like.. Two low fat rice cakes (29x2=58), One cup Oceana light cranberry juice (20), A tomato (35), half a cup of rice (242/2=121), and a pickle (8).


Which would leave me at a total of 242, though, if my family is watching, I'll have one more cup of Oceana light cranberry juice (20), and a date (40). 


Which would give me a total of 302. 


Alright so Marya Hornbacher's "Wasted" Is my all time favourite Ana/Mia book. Then "The best little girl in the world", followed by "Wintergirls" Are there any more books on the topic you'd recommend? If so, please let me know.


Got into a fight with an bulimic friend of mine via - bbm. She called me fat I told her I wish she'd stick her fingers so far down her throat she'd choke and die, she's apologised five times, immature am I? if you ask me, fat is still the worst thing in the world to say. She's agreed with my biggest fear. 


On a lighter note, if any of you do have bbm, I swear I'm not always so mean! So contact me and we can talk, it'll be fun, a support-like thing!